(My internet connection has been out for several days, and I was too busy to call Cox and go through all the effort to figure out the problem. Today I got around to it and it seems my wonderful cat companion has been exploring among the wires and cords and loosened something up. So now I'm playing catch up.)
I think most of us have a "code of honor" that tells us what our duties are. I've tried not to have one plenty of times but it just doesn't go away. I'm not sure where it comes from and for a long time I thought it interfered with self-care. But that's the last thing it does! Paying my bills on time, filing my taxes - all of those "duties" prevent bad things from happening to me. Other kinds of duties -like responsibilities for other people - like the many advocacy chores I do for my son and daughter with disabilities - are sometimes very difficult, energy-draining, and time consuming. But when I've done them I feel more like my true self, the person I really want to be. Taking care of these duties is essential for my spiritual growth and self respect.
"I don't want to do this, but I feel it's important to do because..." "Even when we don't want to be doing what we must, we may find ourselves almost enjoying ourselves..." Ignoring our duties piles up guilt and anxiety. Fulfilling true duties energizes us. It feels good in the end."
- Melody Beattie. 52 Weeks of Conscious Contact.
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