Sunday, March 08, 2009

I recently rediscovered the Adult Children of Alcoholics program which began in the 80s. I attended some meetings back then but it was so new there wasn't much recovery. I was also new in my own recovery and not ready. I don't know if my mother was alcoholic or not, but I have virtually all the characteristics of an "adult child." I've been attending a few meetings and bought the books. To my surprise I found that a lot of the difficulties in functioning I've had in my life are considered to be traits of adult children. Since the wreck I've had severe symptoms of PTSD and dissociation that have impaired my ability to get things done - thus my todolist obsession. But even before the wreck the same symptoms got in my way a lot. So now I am hoping that the ACA program will free me - even if only partially - from some of the more debilitating difficulties.

One of the common ACA traits that I have is being frightened by angry people and any personal criticism. Heard in a recent ACA meeting in regard to when an angry person attacks: "Sit with the situation and accept it. Then you can respond with love instead of defensiveness. Have compassion for the person and where he/she is. Don't take it personally." Can't do that yet but hope to get there. There are almost no angry people in my life, but from time to time I have to deal with one. So, this is a new way to think about it besides just getting the hell out of there!

1 comment:

Liz said...

Hmmmm. Stuff to think about for me too. When I am frightened by those angry people, I attack! Working on changing that. Hard work this ACA stuff!

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