Friday, February 20, 2009

Self Discipline Discovery

This is me when I've finished my "todolist!" Only once in my life have I ever finished a list and I had to stay up almost 24 hours to do it. So, my latest self-discipline project is to just try to do something on the list every day. Baby steps in other words. My list has now shrunk to just one 8 1/2 by 11 inch page. Incredible. I've never had such a short list. And this is while giving first priority to "rest." I've discovered that it is just no use at all to try to do anything unless I've had sufficient rest. In the process of recovery from injury, rest needed can vary enormously from day to day. For example, yesterday was a day when after 11:30 I just rested. Didn't do another thing except answer a couple of phone calls. Read a little bit. Fixed myself a small amount of food. Slept and watched mindless tv. In the past this behavior would have been accompanied by intense and miserable guilt and self-loathing which in turn would wear me out. Yesterday I just accepted that for some unknown reason I needed a huge amount of rest. I feel much more energetic today. It's a weird way to describe self-discipline, but allowing myself to rest almost all day and all night without guilt required all my self-discipline.

1 comment:

ericmix said...

Me too! I've had a good deal of guilt this past year for not getting much done on the farm. Now I realize it was not just a "great metaphysical pause," as a dear friend once described it--this was a year of rest and recovery from the trauma of subjecting myself to the ER for two years! As my self discipline grows, I feel good, but if I need to sleep all day after a weekend in the ER, I no longer feel guilty :-)

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