When I started moving from feeling helpless to solve problems to living in solutions, it felt like a whole new planet and a whole new life. I was excited because I learned that I am the one that can change in order to solve problems and I don't have to try fruitlessly to change someone else. It's a pretty big challenge to change myself, but at least that method of problem-solving at least has a hope of actually happening!
So, the very first step in living in solutions is believing that I am capable of solving problems. Even if I don't know what to do, there's a world of people and information that can help me if I just ask. Luckily I was past the stage in life where I thought only weak people asked for help. I was willing to admit to being weak if that was what it took. I was beat.
The help I got was a combination of information and instruction on how to generate solutions. The basic thing about generating solutions was to ask myself one question: "How can I make this situation better or solve this problem WITHOUT trying to make anyone else change."
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